odins-one-eyed-fuck:

shadogal94:

dreamerofderse:

so my mom brought home one of the new 100 dollar bills 

image

I’m looking at it like “yeah this looks kinda cool”

but then you flip it over and

image

it looks like it has fucking wordart on it

imageimage

They literally fucking used WordArt

AMERICA

meloetta:

"text me when you get home so i know you’re safe" kinda people are the people i wanna be around

amydoesthings:

cumslayer:

cumslayer:

So I went on a date today and we went to a nice restaurant before going to the movies and I ordered the “iced grape popsicles” for dessert because I love grape Popsicles so why not right?…..so the waiter brings out the “iced grape popsicles” aND THEY WERE LITERALLY 3 FROZEN GRAPES ON STICKS…..I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE OFFENDED IN MY LIFE…SINCE WHEN ARE 3 FUCKING FROZEN GRAPES IN A FUCKING VASE AN ACCEPTABLE SINGLE DESSERT ORDER..ITS NOT EVEN FROZEN GRAPE JUICE OR SOMETHING ITS LITERALLY JUST A 0.02$ GRAPE THAT WAS PUT ON A STICK THEN FROZEN…LIKE SOMEONE ACTUALLY WROTE THIS DOWN ON THE MENU THINKING “OH YEAH PEOPLE FUCKING LOVE COLD GRAPES” AND SOME OTHER ASSHAT SAID “BRAH. HEAR ME OUT, HOW ABOUT WE PUT THEM ON STICKS AND SERVE THEM IN A VASE WITH NOTHING ELSE” LIKE YOU COULDNT EVEN SERVE IT WITH A FUCKING SECOND FRUIT OR EVEN FUCKING LEAVES OR WHATEVER… IM SO MAD. FUCKING FROZEN GRAPES ON A STICK.

AND THEY WERENT EVEN SEEDLESS GRAPES…..

THAT LAST COMMENT IS WHAT DID IT. HOW DARE THEY

leonkumquat:

when my dad was in college he had a friend who told a girl he’d take her on a date unlike any other she’d ever been on and so he took her to the supermarket to watch the lobsters fighting in the lobster tank

they’re married now

sliceofbri:

guys this super cute black girl came in my store with big, beautiful, natural hair and she was showing off her new red dress and i told her “you look so beautiful, just like annie!” and she and her mom didn’t know about the new movie coming out so i showed her the trailer and she said “mommy she looks just like me!” and her smile was so fucking huge

don’t tell me representation isn’t important

thunderboltsortofapenny:

recoveringfrommyconvictions:

gaymerboy99:

littlelionmonster:

oldmanstephanie:

"Fuck You, Old People" — Group Piece at CUPSI 2014

"By the way, you can’t actually pick yourself up by your own bootstraps. That’s now how physics works."

FUCK. YES.

this gives me life….

"Act your fucking age" god damn, this has a good message here.

39 seconds in and I reblogged it

monkeysmeanbusiness:

utteranonymity:

Fun little trick I learned in therapy: validation. When someone is upset, don’t try to fix the problem, point out the cause, or tell them it could be worse. Just validate their emotions. Be like, ‘shit yeah man, that sucks. I’m sorry you’re going through that. I’m here for you.’ That’s literally all you have to do to make them feel better. Thank you and goodnight.

A-fucking-men.


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